Mistakes, boobie-doodles, or oopsies
Mistakes are weird. They come in families. First you make daddy mistake, then here comes mommy mistake, then they make babies.
I noticed that mostly at work. Somebody makes a mistake (in my case that was often me) then, inexorably, that creates another mistake which is related to fixing the first mistake. Then that mistake breeds another or three until finally the original mistake is completely over. Its series has run its course.
There’s rarely ever just one mistake. Pretty weird.
Another thing about mistakes, at least with me, is that they’re cumulative. My boo-boos remain with me. They stick like velcro in memory, available for recollection whenever I want to feel the least bit shitty, which apparently is quite a lot. Anybody want to trade subconsciousii? Mine is starting to weigh me down with negative joss.
Oh well, my mother dipped me in Dumbass Creek as an infant, so at least my heel is not foolish. I need to focus on that part, to maintain self-respect. Or else come to value the fool in me.
A lot easier to value foolishness in others, since they’re the ones who have to pay for it.
Duh,
LWIII
what happened to being enthusiastic about it?
anyways… who said you where allowed to be the judge of what is or isn’t a mistake?
what makes you think you are qualified to judge anything at all?
oh saw a great quote for this…
http://www.eboards4all.com/717093/messages/45236.html
http://kikipotamus.files.wordpress.com/2007/12/hafez-mural.jpg
Even after all this time
the sun never says to the earth,
“You owe me.”
Look what happens
with a love like that,
it lights the whole sky. – Hafiz
you awe me
xx azyh ~ bern
Me not know, enthusiasm-wise. Hard to be enthusiastic about pain and fear, though I try. And I’m still very enthusiastic, just more in theory these days. Intellectually I maintain all hope for good.
I love your comments, Azyh. I think I’m allowed to be judgemental just because I can be, not because I think it’s a good idear, that’s for sure. I judge mainly by emotion and societal conditioning. If something makes me feel ashamed afterward, then it feels to me like a mistake. Thank you for reminding me that I really have no idea when I am making a mistake whether or not it will turn out good or bad. (Bad and good in this context meaning painful or non-painful.)
There’s a reason the Holy Fool or Court Jester does so many bad things all in a row. I just don’t know what it is.
Haifiz’s lovely poem about the sun reminds me of God. The love of God is not conditional, it’s ultimate. I don’t get this whole divine punishment thing. Why would the creator of everything require our love? ‘He’ is love. That we are here at all is enough. That’s our love. Even if we are just a bunch of lowly sinners.
One of the many differences between me and God is that ‘He’ is smart enough to be nonjudgemental. And we are kinda built for judgement, being mammals and all.
That’s my theory, anyway.
xoxo!
for anything i like see how it can apply within
the love of the sun
like you said is like the love of god
for me also this is a love that harbours no judgement
then I think to myself
is there somewhere that I say “you owe me?”
inside to myself?
outside to others?
I think this is a good way to relinquish judgement
then i mistyped before owe – awe
i thought that would be a good replacement
for you owe me
you awe me
then the judgement is turned into something loving
so if we are limited beings
living a limited life
then transending these limits
is as simple as reaching out to eachother
for love and support
and loving and supporting eachother
with loving and supportive thoughts
turn them all into love with “you awe me”
and watch the reserection unfold
another good transformer is
i am sorry
please forgive me
thank you
i love you
if we are going to judge
why not just make it for love?
xx azyh
oh and pain
thats just one way to bring attention to something ignored
healing is about attention
bringing attention and awareness to something hidden
find other ways to notice what is hidden
being creative is the best way to reveal what is hidden for healing
the hidden blank canvas or page becomes a detail that was lost
why spend our lives fighting pain
when all we really need to do is
notice it
then keep noticing past it, beyond it
open up and allow all the is hidden to surface
xx azyh
I have two words I live by, dear Azyh: repression and denial, the twin pillars that suspend my mandated ignorance, that bridge to nowhere.
Man, I sure like your way better!
Here’s one from KG:
Much of your pain is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self.
~ Kahlil Gibran
The answer is to move toward the pain, as you say. Running away from pain is to treat the symptom. Turning toward pain is to treat the cause.
Too bad I’m so chicken on the pain thing. I can only do that in spurts, something of a temporary reserection.
I was hoping the awe thing was a typo. And I may not be so good at loving myself at present, but I sure love you, and that’s enough for now.
Thanks so much for you loving support, Azyh, you are right about that, it’s very much the key.
Your grateful pal,
LWIII